Sometimes, things just come together so beautifully. Sitting in the front room with Toni and Marti and suddenly understanding what I've heard all along about creating our own reality was a very profound moment. It's very different from trying to alter your thoughts and "change your reality" through force of will. We didn't do it through will power, We did it through our receptivity, and our love, and we created a healing web that nourished all of us.
I had a dream last week, where I saw the strings, smoke, and mirrors of perception. In the dream I was receiving intuition about a situation that seemed unsafe, all on a barely conscious level. I saw the lens descend that told me I was just being neurotic, and having a self-serving agenda. This lens screened out what I had seen which had put me on alert, and I second-guessed myself. I saw the lens I was looking through, and how it changed how I viewed my available options.
This came at the same time I read a wonderful post my cousin Lori wrote about two weeks ago. She illustrated it with a fractal, which demonstrates that the Part is contained and subsumed within the Whole. She wrote: "I already am all that I seek." She linked to one of her earlier posts where she was discussing Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert, with some other bloggers. In response to a question about suffering she described a temporal self, and a larger, profound Self which encompasses the temporal. As I read I realized what Toni, Marti, and I had done; in holding our lenses to the light, we had connected with our Larger Selves, which are in turn One.
I realize why I blog, and why I read others' blogs. In my own writing sometimes, or in something I read, I stumble across a bit of glass that gives me a glimpse of connection with my Higher Self.
But there is still the temporal me. That's right now following the contours and indentations of the fractal around the minutiae of worry about my son's adhd, gathering myself to do the things that set the wheels in motion to get divorced, and looking for work. And, I think one of the insights I have received is that I have to tend to all of my selves, and can't neglect the temporal in favor of the Infinite.